Winter learning journey Day 2 Writing a short story using your imagination
One quiet sunny day I went for a walk, I crossed the park and noticed the park was empty. No people, no animals, nothing at all. All I could hear was a squeaky sound, I kept walking and trying to figure out where the sound was coming from. I got closer to the swing and I realised the sound was one of the swings, swinging back and forth by itself with no one pushing it, no one on it or no wind blowing it. I looked at the other swing beside it, it was not moving, I began to feel scared and ran home. When I got home I told my mum about the swing and she said it might be broken, but to me I think it was something else like a ghost.
Hi Opeti,
ReplyDeleteWhat a creepy story. You made me feel like I was there with you.
I can see we need to do some work on using commas in the right places. I will give you some activities to help you with this.
Please also remember the structure of a story. We still need paragraphs to keep our ideas separate. It will add more impact to your words.
Well written and keep up the "exciting writing"!
Mrs M
OK Mrs M thank you very much
ReplyDeleteOpeti you are an amazing writer. Gosh, you had me hooked and scared! I love the way you described the park and the approach to the swing. It was like watching a movie. Keep writing like this.
ReplyDeleteMrs Burt
Manaiakalani
I could hear the swing squeaking with no one on it. That made me feel very scared as all I could think about were ghosts. Your writing had me hooked. Keep writing.
ReplyDeleteHey Opeti,
ReplyDeleteI really like your creepy story and it also felt like I was in the story and I was hooked.
I wanted to read more and more but it was a short story.
Keep up the good work.
Kind Regards,
Dianne